Living With Anxiety?!?!

Hey guys, I've been wanting to make this blogpost for a while but I always thought it wasn't something I could share and talk about until reccently. I've always been quite shy around new people and I'm very good at hiding who I really am and my feelings. Anxiety is one of those things I've hidden for a long time. I've suffered from anxiety and panic attacks for at least two or three years but I've always been afraid of trying new things and meeting new people. The main reason that my photo and my full name isn't in this blog is because I don't have the confidence and it terrifies me (which I hope you understand). The main thing that triggers my panic attacks is being trapped or feeling like I have no way out of a situation. This is going to sound very stupid but my claustrophobia started when I was younger and I got trapped in one of those tube slides that are pitch black at an indoor play area. As a child, I found this really scary because there was a girl behind me and lots of people in front of me so I couldn't get out.bI was stuck for the best part of forty odd minutes and I was terrified because I could see anything and j had no idea how long I was going to be stuck for. Even now at seventeen I can't do anything if I can't see where I'm going (yes I'm afraid of the dark). It's sounds so stupid when I say it out loud but I think that event is what caused my anxiety. There are also a few words that will set me off into a panic attack because I've been bullied my whole life. I left one school thinking I could leave it behind and it would just start a lover again. Even if one of my friends says a particular word, I'll have to lock my self in the toilet and try to calm myself down. There also the issue of feeling trapped. Just reccently my friends wanted to go ice skating and I can't ice skate so I said I'd stay home and do some work.even though I'm sure they meant no harm, I felt like they were trying to force me to go and I started to have a panic attack. Because if my anxiety I also can't drink alcohol because I feel like I'm losing control and I often have to miss parties because I don't want to throw this on anyone. I feel like I'm constantly making up excuses because I'm worried about my anxiety so I have to base my soical life around the fact I might have a panic attack. I'm a,whas having to stay safe which means I got a lot of places with my mum such as the doctors and the dentist. I can't even face being in public transport by myself which I feel like is a shame. It makes me feel like I'm so alone and I have no one I can turn to which is kind of making me feel down at the moment. This would be the part where I'd tell you that if you suffer with anxiety, see a doctor but that would be hypocritical becaue I haven't even told my parents. Actually I think this is the first time I've talked about it.  

So why do people have panic attacks? If you body begin to think you are in any sort of danger (which often is not the case) your nervous system begins to kick in and floods your body with adrenaline. You bein to sweat but feel cold, every thing seems twice as loud, you begin to hyperventilate and feel sick. Your heart rate goes right up and you feel like you need to leave whatever situation you're in because your too panicked. Once it's over you feel ok but really it's even more scary because you know that you're going to have one again, you just have no idea when. I find that the scariest part that I could have to leave a situation, even if I'm having fun, in a matter of seconds because I feel trapped. Because of this o try to limit what I do and who I see. I feel that if I tell some one about this they'll just laugh and tell me it's not a serious as I think even though I feel like the worst I ever have. Basically what I'm saying is that if you're friend tell you they have anxiety, take it seriously. You don't know how they feel or what they goin through. Please be considerate. 

Do any of you guys have anxiety, please tell me I'm not the only one. It would mean the world to me. 

Love Georgie xxx

4 comments:

  1. Loads of people all over the world suffer with anxiety, so you're not alone! Lots of love to you!xoxox

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  2. Thank you for following me because otherwise I would have never had read this post! I have anxiety too and I felt exactly the same as you, that no one would understand. Although i've only really spoken about it to a handful of people, it surprised me how understanding people can be. Please never feel alone! If going to the Doctor is too scary, there are programmes out there where you can talk to counsellor's online and eventually strength can be built up if you wanted to speak to someone face to face. I've honestly found talking to be the remedy. Keep strong, you are never alone xoxoxox

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    1. Thank you so much for your support ... It means so much xxx

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